I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, friend.

I'm feeling a lot better now than I did last week. Talked out my worries with certain people and its made me feel much more positive about everything. I was reminded of why I decided to choose this course in the first place, and that I am my own worst enemy when it comes to achieving my goals. I whole-heartedly thank these people as without them I'd still be moping around with a face like a slapped arse. They know who they are.

People may be wondering where the hell I got such an odd title for today's post from. On Friday I read a book called The Fault in Our Stars and it truly touched me - you can tell it was a good book - I read it in a day! The book is about a young girl named Hazel Grace who has cancer. I won't say much more in case you wish to read it but there a a few moments in the book that made me tear up, not for the typical "its a book about kids with cancer" reasons either. This was an amazing book, infact the only one that has ever made me 100% happy and then within minutes have me in pieces on the floor. There were a lot of moments in this book where I just had to stop and take a few minutes to let what I'd just read sink in, this wasn't a typical cancer book -most books about terminal illness are blatantly written/intended to make you cry but this wasn't one of them. I want EVERYONE to read this book.

Just realised that in 8 weeks time I will be an Auntie again, this is just too exciting! I can't wait to go to the hospital and hold my baby nephew or niece for the first time. I know I already am an Auntie but we didn't actually meet Kadie until she was 4 months old with her not actually being my brothers little girl and all so my family missed out on that experience. I really hope the baby is a boy, partly because my brother wants a boy, but mainly because I HATE the name they have chosen for if its a girl. Indie Autum is just not a good name! Aidan James however is beautiful, really can't imagine myself shoulding "Kadie, Idie!" if I take them too the park or something. Not good.

Anyway, I need to go and make myself some tea. So...

Peace Out :)

Its never too late to be what you might have been.

I haven't blogged in quite a long time, I suppose that's mainly because my life has been going pretty fast recently, what with finishing my A Levels and then going on to university. In fact, I think its gone too fast. I'm living in a place that I don't want to be, with people I don't want to be with, doing a course I don't want to do. Thats pretty much a complete opposite to what I was told university would be like.

I was told that it would be the best time of my life, I'd make loads of new friends because I'd have so much in common with the people on my course. But the fact of the matter is, I haven't. I've made one decent friend and he is moving to bloody Hull Uni next year (clearly I'm not the only one that thinks Salford is shit). University is such a contrast to college, I've gone from having a huge group of friends to one decent one. The friendships we made at All Saints are so strong and took so long to form that everything else just seems like utter shit in comparison. As for the course, I always knew that applying to do physics was a big risk, I mean I know I'm not great at maths but I love physics so much that I had to give it a go. I'd have regretted it for the rest of my life and I know I would. But now I'm here and I've tried it, I've realised I couldn't have made a bigger mistake. I can't do the maths side of the course, not without and insane amount of work and help anyway, and I don't want to spend the next 4 years on a course that requires this. I wish I'd never gone through UCAS extra, I wish I'd never applied to Salford, I wish I'd gone to Man Met or Huddersfield as I'd planned to in the first place.

My plan as it stands is to complete this year, drop out of Salford, maybe have a year out and then either go on to do a degree in Human Biology or go straight into a teaching degree, after all, I know thats where I want to end up anyway. Its the only thing I've ever been sure of since starting this whole university process.

Anyway, I'm going to shut up now or I could be here all night typing this out. I could probably write 2000 words with no amount of difficulty.

Peace Out :)